Nominal positions are worthless in the era of positionless basketball.

The Brad Underwood era has aligned perfectly with the rise of social media sports discourse.

In other words, the Brad Underwood era has aligned with the volume elevation of the dumbest corners of sports fandom.

It’s unfortunate because the Underwood era has been largely a colossal success for the university at large and the men’s hoops program specifically.

Of course not, because they have to show up in the conversation with takes inspired by eschewing cold cuts and veggies for Elmer’s glue in their sandwiches.

Here is a short list of some of my favorite dumb takes from the Underwood era.

Morez Johnson should stay at Illinois, rebound, play defense, and shut up. How dare he go to Michigan? He’ll never win anything. He will never hit a three-point shot in a game. He is nothing but a rim runner.

Underwood can’t coach. He should be fired, and we should hire Sean Miller.

Will Riley shouldn’t be shooting the ball. He’s not going through a slump; he sucks.

Kasparas Jakucionis NEEDS to come back to college. He commits too many turnovers, and he won’t ever be good in the NBA until he plays another year in college.

Keaton Wagler needs to add more weight before going to the NBA. Skinny players don’t make it in the pros.

And while all of those takes made me want to drink cleaning solution, there is one dumb take that was perniciously pervasive in 2024 and is rearing its head again.

Brad Underwood’s system is ostensibly “positionless.” It exists so players can fill the roles that best suit them and take full advantage of their best skills. In other words, the nominal point guard as identified in the program or on the broadcast is functionally irrelevant. It’s a label.

Of course Illinois needs facilitators who can trigger the offense.

And yes, it would be nice to also have a tip of the defensive spear who can interrupt an opponent getting into the flow of their offense.

None of those role needs are synonymous with being a point guard.

And Illinois’ roster has players who have all of those skill sets on full display and ready for tactical deployment.

If you need another reminder, I bring you the legendary Skip Bayless vs. Jalen Rose argument that ended with Bayless, who compared himself as a prep hooper to “Pistol” Pete Maravich, being called “Water Pistol Pete Jr.”

Jalen could have ended Bayless’ career right then and there, but with the rise of the internet, witless hot takes became currency, and Skip was the Federal Reserve.

So back to the Illini. In 2024, the Illini were ripped by a segment of fans for not having a “point guard.” The nominal “in the media guide” point guard was Ty Rodgers.