Image source, Getty ImagesImage caption, Alfie Whiteman was on the bench as Tottenham beat Manchester United to win the Europa League in Bilbao last May
1 CommentsAlfie Whiteman scans the self-portraits on display at a Grade II listed art gallery inside the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium, the ones he took of himself hanging out of a tumble dryer, celebrating a birthday alone in the woods and sitting naked on a jetty staring out over Sweden's Lake Mockeln.
"There was no intention of anyone ever seeing these pictures," he laughs. "But that also just reflects how I was living before - I kind of split my life in two."
Whiteman was on the bench when Spurs won the Europa League in Bilbao. Less than a year since that success he is showing BBC Sport his new exhibition having retired at just 26 a few months later.
An open-top bus parade through the north London streets where he grew up was the culmination of more than 15 years with the boyhood club he joined aged 10, having watched them lift the 2008 League Cup at Wembley with his dad.
"I was waving at my friend and sister like 'I'll be home in a sec just doing a loop round the block!'," he says about the Europa League celebrations. "There was a youth centre I used to help out in and one of the kids was like 'Hey! What are you doing there!'"
Whiteman had offers to stay in the game when his Tottenham contract expired last summer, trialling with Championship and League One clubs, but instead decided to focus on his work as a photographer and film director.
Stepping away was a huge decision, though, for a goalkeeper who could have played on for more than a decade. One coach told him retiring would be a "crime".
"I called my agent because I had to be like 'stop, I'm not going to go to this club…' and he was really understanding," says Whiteman. "But I didn't tell anyone, I didn't do an Instagram post like 'guys just so you know…' no one cares about that.
"It's such a commitment, essentially a life's work, sacrifice, all those other things that go with it, to end, in some people's eyes, prematurely. It's rejecting this kind of 'boyhood dream'.
"But I have had the best time of my life in the last eight months, learned so much and been so fortunate to be working with such talented people on exciting things. So I don't think that's necessarily true.
"It was scary, though, because at the time I didn't have anything set up. A few days after I was assisting this photographer and packing down C stands, and like 'this is great'. But I then had to scramble and do things, and still am."
Image source, BBC SportImage caption, Whiteman's debut exhibition Alfie Whiteman: 'A Loan' is on display at the OOF Gallery at Warmington House inside the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium from Friday
Whiteman had long been planning for a career away from professional football. On days off and during afternoons after training, he would meet directors or producers for coffee, or help assist on set as a runner.
He has his own radio show, first appearing under his mother's surname to keep a low profile before deciding "just to be myself".
"Everyone was like 'wow, you're a footballer and you listen to jazz, this is crazy!'," he smiles.
Fans discovered his Letterboxd profile, where he has reviewed more than 200 films, but Whiteman also spent free time working on photography projects and taking acting lessons.
One summer, while his team-mates set off for Dubai or the Maldives, Whiteman appeared in a play in Holborn - an experimental art piece where he played a "really cheesy, over-the-top boyfriend". "So it was quite easy," he jokes.
"All these little things were edging me closer to taking this step into this unknown," says the 27-year-old. "I knew I didn't want to be in football when I was done.
"I was trying to teach myself and learn, so that when that day came I wasn't at zero. I was quite unhappy for a while and thought I would rather try something else when I am young."